Friday, September 17, 2010

Fairy tales ....

It's August 13, 2008 I wake up and prepare to drive 9 hours for the day that I predicted would come.
I spoke the words to the judge in 2002 while sitting on the witness stand. Shaking, scared and intimidated by the silence. I sobbed as I begged the judge not to give my x sole custody of our kids, "if he is granted sole custody, " I said, "it will be just a matter of time before he alienates me from their lives totally."
  Well 8 years, 3 attorney's and 4 judges later that statement I made in court was coming to pass. If only I knew what Parental Alienation meant in 2002, would they have listened to me then? I doubt it.

As I kissed my husband goodbye that hot muggy August morning, I told him I would see him in 2 days, depending on how long this was going to take. As I pulled out of the driveway, I felt somewhat at ease, but yet had a sick feeling in my stomach. What was ahead of me that day I didn't know. What did my future hold for me and my children, I didn't know.

As I drove through Nashville, the sun was peaking its head over the horizon. A new day has come. I still had 6 hours to go. As I drove west on 24 heading to Kentucky I couldn't help but remember when the boys and I would drive through Nashville on our to my parents house. Each time I would play "Just to see you smile" by Tim McGraw. Their was just something I loved, about that song. So of course I had to play it as I traveled through there again. This time, it didn't have the same feeling. I wonder if my boys still remember those times, that song?

Heading east on 24 I started asking myself how did we let it come to this? What went wrong? This just isn't right, it's not what happens to parents, a mother and her kids. This type of thing only happens to, well ya know, bad parents. Abusive parents. Alcoholic parents. This very well maybe true, and in most cases is true. But I was none of those parents. I had a good relationship with my kids. We had a great connection, a tight bond. Where did it all go wrong?

For legal reasons I'm not going to use names.

The first time I met Bob we were in the 8th grade. That was the first time I had heard his name. But we were not interested in each other during this time. But little did I know,  he was going to be the father of my 4 boys and my husband of 7 years. 
   It was 1991, the end of our junior year in high school when we first started talking. He would probably say I started talking to him because I was interested in taking a ride in his jeep. I think I was just interested in him. The jeep wasn't all that great. Anyway, he was a stocky, blond hair blue eyed jock. Not popular, but not an outcast either. I was a pretty girl, with a great eye for fashion. Ok, it was the early 90's and I was still stuck in the 80's just a bit. My hair was long and I curled it everyday. My shoes matched every outfit, well some anyway. I wasn't popular, but not an outcast either. I had friends, and I had enemies. I was considered a stuck up snob, and I don't really know why.
   When Bob and I started talking it was close to the end of the school year. We were all excited about getting the summer before our senior year started and everyone was just coming off the high from prom.
As we rushed to class, it happened, "the kiss."  That was all it took for the rumors to go flying around school that Bob and Angela kissed. Ok, so who didn't kiss their boyfriend or girlfriend in the hallway before class?
   We were finally a couple.

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